Spring is in the Air

As I mentioned in one of my much earlier entries, spring is usually a time when I spend, like many people, a lot of time in my yard. Unfortunately, this year there are a myriad of things keeping me from doing so. Along with the barking, of course, the warming of the weather seems to be cooking up a dog shit stew and the aroma of this stew is now filling the air. This completely negates the fragrance of all lovely shrubs I've been planting over the years just for their fragrant blossoms.

Unfortunately, I can't blame this crappy miasma on the star of this blog, Harley, the barking pest. Although Harley's humans are remiss when it comes to teaching their dogs good social skills, they do keep their yard clean. This actually makes sense because the reason Harley was kicked out of the house in the first place, and thus in his yard ruining my life, was because he was crapping all over the house, and so to avoid having dog shit tracked into the house they scoop and dispose if it in the trash. This still doesn't make up for the barking, however.

More seriously unfortunate, though, are the folks who live behind me who are not so conscientious about their dog crap.

Allow me to give a little history here: back in December '09 the lovely folks who live behind me tied out 3 dogs in their yard (like Christmas week). Yes, chained 'em up, right by the row of cypress trees that divides our properties, way in the back corner of their yard... The dogs, puppies really, had hardly any shelter and upon finding them shivering in the snow one morning I couldn't stand it and went about collecting proper dog houses for them (via a plea on craigslist). Of course, lucky me, when the dogs saw me in my backyard they barked at me, so along with the dog houses I brought treats and I also feed them when it appears they have missed a meal...or two. Well, this has paid off as now the dogs do not bark when they see me (in fact they do not bark all that much, usually, and neglected as they are they have a much better reason to be barking than that idiot, Harley, does).

However, along with neglecting the actual dogs, these lovely neighbors also neglect to clean up the dog crap. Oh, I forgot to mention they are now down to 2 dogs because they called the Animal Control on one of their dogs because she bit the oldest son (who, quite honestly, probably deserved it), and the dog is probably dead now, having been taken to the shelter for biting and most likely killed in the county's gas chamber. In this picture is the condemned dog. One day she was there, the next day she was gone and never came back. Despite the fact that I'm really and literally sick and tired of dealing with all of my negligent neighbors' dogs, I was really sad about this and if I had known about it at the time I would have called one of my crazy animal rescue friends as they never would have allowed the dog to go to the shelter to be killed. She was actually a good girl and, I thought, cute. Someone, but definitely not my neighbors, had taught her some manners and she would sit on command, and she never, ever, gave me any indication of being aggressive or vicious. In fact, these folks told me to watch out for the brown & white dog in the photo below because he bites, but he, again, has never tried to bite me nor has he given any indication of being aggressive (yet). In fact, all these dogs seem to like me really well and start wagging their tails when they see me... sigh... it's so sad, really.

Before I continue on about the dog shit in the air, let me tell you that I did call Animal Control to report the inhumane conditions (you can see the brown & white dog had a traveling crate for his shelter, knocked on its side, and the brown dog had small wooden box (with, we later found out, nails inside sticking down from the top) but apparently Animal Control found nothing wrong with any of this and next I looked the dogs still had the same old inadequate shelters. The third dog, who I have no photos of, also had a traveling crate, holes facing up.

But anyway, the dogs now have real dog houses, complete with straw beds inside, thanks to some concerned folks on craigslist and my friend Terry. They are still tied up and neglected by their owners, so I'm not really sure how good I should actually feel about doing this though.

So, I must now admit to being remiss myself, as when I was over there with my friend Terry, who was kind enough to bring over a free dog house, I noticed piles of dog shit all around the dogs and then later noticed that the kid had just raked it all up into a large pile at the back corner of the yard, and at the time I failed to say anything about properly disposing of it in the trash, and so now I'm suffering the olfactory consequences of my own negligence. In my defense, I was raised to clean up after the dog (yes, we had a dog when I was a kid) and so I just find it baffling that people leave dog crap laying around their yards (not to mention let their dogs bark like psychos for hours and hours...). Mom never would have allowed this when I was a kid.

So, now 3 of my senses are being abused by my negligent neighbors and their dogs: visual (seeing the dogs suffering), auditory (hearing them bark), and olfactory (smelling their shit).

Did I say yet that, even though I do like a nice well-behaved dog, the only reason I don't actually have a dog myself is because I'm too lazy to train it, take it for walks, and clean up after it? Sigh. I must have really bad karma.

So now I have to say something to these neighbors behind me about the rank aroma in the air which originates from their dogs' B-holes, and further risk making a nuisance of myself and provoking yet more neighborly animosity. I'll keep it simple:

"Hello! As the weather has warmed up I can now smell dog poop as soon as I open my back door, not only in my yard but also in my house if I wish to open my doors and windows on a nice day. This odor is very nauseating, not to mention it is very unhygienic to leave dog poop laying about the yard, and so I'd appreciate it if you would make sure the dogs' poop is disposed of properly in the trash rather than being raked up into a pile in the corner of the yard. Thank you! Sincerely..."

Yeah, there's no remaining anonymous here. They know me alright. All of the negligent dog owner's around here know me.

One last thing: I find it rather ironic that all the neighbors hate me since I am the one who has the best manicured yard with pretty & fragrant flowers, I'm very quiet, I'm always picking up trash that blows in or falls out of neighboring trash cans (that everyone else seems to overlook), I don't have a lot of cars parked on my place, nor people coming & going, and I keep my cats either inside or contained in their own yard (and my cats, other than the occasional meow and/or purr, don't make any noise).

Legal Action...non sequitur

It's been a while since I've made any entries here but, trust me, Harley the dog has not been as remiss with his barking as I have been with my writing.

However, it's time I quite whining about the yapper and share my experiences and advice in dealing with a barking nuisance and shitty, rude neighbors.

Unfortunately, and this is very depressing, according to what I've read about other people's experiences, the chances seem to be slim to none that you'll get any satisfaction from the laws or the courts very quickly, and my own experience, to date, concurs with this. But anyway...in the event that you are either really lucky or you live in one of those evolved areas in which humans are top priority...

Find out what your local laws, codes and ordiances are pertaining to noise and animals, and keep a copy on hand to refer back to at a moments notice. Scrutinize them thoroughly because your neighbor might be in violation of more than just the barking section. If you can't find the ordinances on your local gov. web sites you can probably find them here: http://www.amlegal.com/library/ This is for the United States.

Call or visit the local magistrate/court, the Police, the Sheriff, the Animal Control...anyone and everyone so you can find out or confirm exactly what procedure needs to be followed to deal with these noise/animal nuisance violations. Keep at it until you are certain you know the correct process. I failed to do this. I was initially told one thing (by a magistrate and an animal control officer), which I put all my energy into preparing for, then when I went to the magistrate's office to file my complaint I was told I couldn't do this, and was then told the process was something entirely different. So after the weekend I'm going to start calling around to make sure I now know the correct process to follow so I don't waste more time.

In general, the following is what everyone, including Monroe and Union County residents should do in their quest for peace. And, by the way, don't wait until you have been driven completely batty by the barking and are in desperate need of relief. Many of us wait, hoping that the neighbors will suddenly become good citizens or that a large tree will fall on the barking dog, but it won't happen and the barking will continue unabated in many cases.

1. Start gathering evidence right away, in the event you end up in court.

• Written documentation, such as a Barking Log. My Barking Log has the date, the day, the time, the barking status (barking or quiet), and a column for other relavent notes (what the dog was barking at, where I was when the dog was barking, if the dog woke me up, whether the neighbors came out to quiet the dog or he just stopped on his own, when I had to leave home to get some peace, etc.), and I also have a column called Cat Location since my cats are often blamed but usually innocent. In some areas you might have to count the barks per minute, in which case you can go to barkingdogs.net where there is a form and instructions.
• I also keep a Call Log, mainly for my own reference, which includes the name of the person I spoke with, who they are (i.e., police, dog trainer, dog owner, etc.), their phone number, the date and time, and the purpose/results of the call;
• I'm also have an ongoing chart of how the barking has affected my health, physically and emotionally, which also includes when I've gone to the doctor, chiropractor, massage therapist seeking help for or relief from the symptoms caused by the barking;
• Another statement as to how the barking has forced me to modify my activities both inside and outside my house.
• Keep all receipts and record the financial impact of the barking (i.e., medical bills, barking deterrents such as the ultrasonic device I bought that didn't work, sound proofing material for your home, etc.);
• Video recordings with sound. I used my cell phone and digital camera so I have a lot of short clips and videos on different days, at various times, both inside the house and outside, but if possible purchase a security camera which you can mount in a stretegic spot on the outside of your home (preferably where the neighbors can't see it) to record the barking 24/7. Try to exclude any identifying landmarks, but do try to include the dog in the video so he can be seen as well as heard if there are no shrubs or fence to block the view. A wireless model would be perfect, and send the feed to your computer and back it up. This will also be helpful if you have to do the bark per minute thing, although you might have to take some xanax after having to listen to the same barking twice or thrice to get the count correct.

2.  I didn't do this, and I regret it, but rather than talk to the neighbors about it (like I did), send them the anonymous letter, via the post. Don't use threats, expletives, or other nastiness. Be nice and polite. There is a chance that the owner just doesn't know how much the dog is barking (hard to believe, I know, but apparently it does happen). Try to sound like more than one neighbor is being disturbed by the barking (if you are in fact the only one like I am). Explain the depth to which this barking occurs, the times, etc., and ask if some other arrangements can be made to make the dog happy so it doesn't bark so much. Keep a copy of this letter. There is a very slim chance that this will work but if you are really, really lucky, the barking will be dealt with (one way or anyother) and you won't have to go any further.

3.  If the letter doesn't work, call the law. It's always embarrassing to have the cops show up at your house so call the Police first. I recommend requesting to remain anonymous, if possible, and I also suggest calling the local nonemergency 911 number so the operator can hear the barking in the background, and ask them to dispatch a Police officer. If you are really lucky this one visit from the law will be enough to prompt your neighbor into quieting the dog, one way or another, or getting rid of it.

4.  If this first visit from the police has no impact, call the local animal control and ask them to make a visit. Continue to remain anonymous as long as possible, but you will, at this point, want to start having conversations with the law enforcment officers to make sure they are following the correct legal procedures (e.g., issuing citations, etc.). Have your copies of the ordinances/codes handy to refer to if necessary. When dealing with the law, always remain polite and courteous, even if you feel murderous. Don't use expletives, don't badmouth the neighbors or the dog...just state the barking facts...and you might even wish to express a bit of concern for the dog's neglect (even if you don't give a shit), because lot of people take animal neglect more seriously than they do the health and well being of the human who is being traumatized by the dog's barking, and barking is a sign of some sort of neglect.

If, by chance, your sly neighbor runs out to shut the dog up as soon as the Officers drive up and they don't hear the barking (this happened to me twice, and they have to hear the barking to be able to do anything about it), you'll have to call again but explain what happened and ask if they can park down the street and arrive on foot. In my case, I suggested to the Animal Control Officers that they park in the church parking lot that borders the back half of our backyard, and walked through our yard to our back door. They kindly did, and on their way through the yard they heard every shrill yip, piercing yap and mind splitting bark.

Unfortunately, at this time, even though my neighboring psycho barking nuisance has been heard, loud and clear, by both the police and 2 animal control officers, I'm still living in barking hell.

If nothing is done to your satisfaction you will either have to move or just go insane or...whatever... In some cases being very diligent has paid off. You can also begin work on changing the noise and animal laws. For this, since I have not gone this far yet, I recommend consulting the experts in the Barking Dogs Yahoo Group and BarkingDogs.net which is the most informative web site on the planet about barking dogs.
Good luck, and I hope you can get some peace and quiet before you become as batty as I have.